On reciprocal tender messages of affection: Sonja: "Alan, I love you." A great memorable quote from the I'm Alan Partridge movie on Quotes.net - Lynn Benfield: Do you want to hear the good news or the bad news?Alan Partridge: The good news.Lynn Benfield: Well, Rawlinson's say you can have another fifty of the shop-soiled chocolate oranges if you plug them again tomorrow.Alan Partridge: Excellent. I was trying to pay you a compliment, unless I've grossly misread the situation. Alan Partridge: You work in a petrol station Michael. Estate Agent: Could swing a tiger in here, really! But as I listened through the darkness I realized that something far worse was going on. So, iou be Tony Hayers. On age difference being nothing but a number: "I'm 47. And its a great thing too. Aqua. Michael: Right. My marriage fell apart soon after that. He must have a foot like a traction engine. [Alan is having his disturbing recurring daydream of himself as a male stripper]. No, seriously, run. Lynn: Good. Lynn: Good. 20. 4. Go to London, and I guarantee you will be either assaulted or unappreciated. Take the train to London, stopping at Rejection, Disappointment, Backstabbing Central and Shattered Dreams Parkway. Erm, terrible idea. My backside pleads with me to continue but I resist, and in a few seconds the itch subsides on its own, as I knew it would.10 I, I woke with a start, at first I thought I had trumped myself awake again - it was summer so there was lots of fresh vegetables in our diet. 24. No! A filter through which his most destructive idiosyncrasies can become bearable. [Inspecting the bathroom in a house he wishes to purchase]. But fine, I'll sack her. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Alan Partridge: If you think you can upstage Jill by wearing that you're very much mistaken. Alan Partridge: I think he'll be a bit tougher than that, Lynn. Alan Partridge: Ah-haaaaa! Our goofy radio host gives a unique introduction to the world of drug-based sex fetishes. But, yeah, I used to dream that one day I'd drive a brand-new Range Rover towing a speed boat. So, er, thanks. Alan Partridge: Oh, I like this. Alan Partridge: I will not have uncleansed coffee cups in Pear Tree Productions. Jill: [laughs] What? Love is in the air! Peter Linehan: Has he given you another series? "I'm Alan Partridge Quotes." And that, was a gooooooal! And I dont mean a little. Its like being inside a huge Foxs Glacier Mint, which, again, is a bonus to me. I've been working like a Japanese prisoner of war. ", Alan responds to Irish history: If it was just the potatoes that were affected, at the end of the day you will pay the price if youre a fussy eater., Alan responds to being fired: Smell my cheese!, Alan on the Daily Mail: Its arguably the best newspaper in the world. A second series followed in 2002, with Partridge now living in a static caravan after recovering from a mental breakdown. Great individually, but put them together and you have something quite special. Alan Partridge: You are a big posh sod with plums in your mouth, and the plums have mutated and they have got beaks. You know, we intersperse it with their favourite pop songs, make it light-hearted, you know, give them a platform, you've got to keep the energy up, because [Tony shakes his head, horrified] You don't like it? I mean, this will put Norwich on the map. 11th August 2017. Ooooooh, it's a good paper. Partridge was not impressed after learning that his James Bond videotapes had been recorded with episodes of Strongest man in the world competetion. Backfired. ", 17. Lynn Benfield: Well, Rawlinson's say you can have another fifty of the shop-soiled chocolate oranges if you plug them again tomorrow. . It was a perfect storm of no sleep, no wife, and angry brushes whirring towards me. A great memorable quote from the I'm Alan Partridge movie on Quotes.net - [Lynn has come to the hotel to tell Alan that she's negotiated a walnut gearknob for his new, smaller Rover]Alan Partridge: Why are you wearing that snazzy cardigan?Lynn: Oh, I just threw it on.Alan Partridge: If you think you can upstage Jill by wearing that you're very much mistaken. He doesn't like that. I heard a bit of commotion. 2021 Associated Newspapers Limited. . I've got one here. I'll call you back. Welcome back. Alan Partridge: Right. I do enjoy these chats in the morning. Especially no Bravo Two Zero by Andy McNabb, which actually improves with every read. Michael: Aye. By. Alan Partridge: Why are you wearing that snazzy cardigan? Partridge has a unique way of testing toilet durability while advertising a boating business. Great joke between Partridge and his friend Dan. We're on a submarine. Do you deny that? Even then it's going to weigh the best part of a ton. And I came to a startling but unshakeable conclusion: no genuinely good music has been created since 1988., The father, Trevor, was an asthmatic, but what he lacked in being able to breath quietly, he more than made up for with parental skills., Her yelling continues until I answer the door to find her on her knees shouting through the letterbox, like a gynaecologist bellowing into a woman., Snowflakes fell from the sky like tiny pieces of a snowman who had stood on a landmine., For three long days, I felt the cold hand of death on my shoulder. They say it will help people in * wheelchairs *. 1 Mar. Alan Partridge: Yes, you did. "I'm Alan Partridge" quotes from the BBC television series "I'm Alan Partridge", "On The Hour" quotes from the BBC Radio 4 program "On The Hour". Alan then bursts in through the double doors] Alan Partridge: It flushed on the first yank! Alan Partridge: I'm leaving you, you cow! Lost in the depths of despair I tried to figure out what I had done to deserve this. Yeah, you're definitely sacked. Lynn, I pierced my foot on a point! "[My assistant]" Despite her dedicated, efficient and often demeaning work, Alan treated Lynn with disdain and a lack of care, and paid her a paltry salary. But I peck, overall a very good effort, seven against ten. Alan Partridge: No. You are someone who has a proven track record for making mostly bad television programs. [a pause as Alan looks at the estate agent]. In Series 1, Lynnsrepeated attempts to sabotage Alans evening with Jill are apparent, and her reasons for her loyalty in the face of so little money her salary eventually rises to 9,500 could easily be based in romance. Alan Partridge: Pity, because they were very keen on that one. Hello, Tony. What a beautiful song. Friedrich Schiller CHARTERIS [unfolding his arms in terror] No, please. It's embarrassing. Minor repairs. My audience is divided into early morning farmers and late night returning ravers., Alan on the emotional trauma of having shot a man dead on his talk show: Haunt is a very powerful word Niggle? Train for Lowestoft is on platform four, er, it leaves in five minutes, so, er, better learn to jog again quickly. 'Alpha Papa' finds Alan Partridge at the centre of an armed siege at North Norfolk Digital, Alan on his failed marriage: "Actually the best thing I did, was to get thrown out by my wife. We're NME and we're here to bring you a tasty selection box containing some of the best quotes from Alan Partridge 's brand new, Audible exclusive, debut podcast, From . It's like being inside an enormous Fox's Glacier Mint, which again, to me, is a bonus. So that they can only be identified by reference to their dental records. Superb. Tony Hayers: [Holds his hands up] No, I'm sorry, no! Jason: [putting a party hat on Alan's head] Wahey! Alan Partridge: [forcing a smile] No, he won't give me one. But what about drugs and sex? My mother tuts and looks away., Wed love your help. Alan Partridge: I prefer to go alone. He almost got dirty. And the bad news?Lynn Benfield: The accountants say that since you . Alan Partridge: I'm being bawdy, Lynn. That's terrible. But not too informal; it's not Nigel Pinsent's "In Depth", but neither is it Wally Banter's Junk-Box. Oh God. 1 on Billboard 200 Billboard. Alan Partridge: See, you did it again! Mashable is a registered trademark of Ziff Davis and may not be used by third parties without express written permission. Later we'll be taking dedications for anyone wrongly turned down for planning permission. It really encapsulates the frustration of a Sunday, doesn't it? Alan Partridge: Well, then, you must be a full moon! Hit your targets or you'll be fired. Its one of British comedys most unlikely will-they-wont-they scenarios. Madeline Mussen. And in these sheds you have 20ft high chickens, and these chickens are scared because the don't know why they're so big, and they're going, "Oh why am I so massive?" Will this show on my invoice?. [they lean in close to each other, face to face]. When North Norfolk Digital was sent a box of heavy metal CDs,19 muggins here was about to open it when fellow DJ Rudy Gibson shouted over, Careful, Alan. Alan Partridge: Yeah, well, that's not good enough. I love this house. But Im Alan Partridge was to be her first major, recurring comedy role, and one that she really made her own. Nevertheless, nice song. Part of HuffPost Entertainment. Blow 'im to bits. With one hand braced against the wall, Im now grabbing and clawing at the angry aperture, slashing and scraping in a bid to ease the sensation. Enjoy it. Could we see her finally standing up to her longstanding oppressor? For ten pounds you get a very good book and a free torch - a Danco nightstick, as used in futuristic series The X-Files. I looked up and saw it was none other than Peter Purves, it was the pinnacle of his Blue Peter career. The humor is off-beat, and you have to spend some time getting used to it. Join. It's seven pounds six. Da, da, da - and now a really big bounce right over and I land on my feet. Still, good news about the chocolate oranges. It helps me keep the wolf from the door, so to speak. The latest on your favourite shows and stars delivered straight to your inbox. Relive an anecdote about a hectic train journey. It really encapsulates the frustration of a Sunday, doesn't it? [Lynn has come to the hotel to tell Alan that she's negotiated a walnut gearknob for his new, smaller Rover]. At a sparsely attended funeral, his casket has been blessed and lowered into the ground. [Alan gets up from his seat and thrusts the cheese into Tony Hayers' face]. On keeping. There is an awkward pause] Sorry, bit of a joke there. I think we all did. Superb. I don't agree with that, but I don't like hairy women., Like a good-looking John Merrick, mine was a face that looked really shit., Now, this is an uncomfortable thing to discuss, but I run towards discomfort like a man who has strapped truth explosives to his body and made his peace with God., As I write these words Im noisily chomping away on not one, but two Murray Mints. At the bottom of the net! On seduction: "No, Jill will be sleeping with me tonight." Cashback! I was so happy I wanted to shout it from the rooftop. I mean, people forget that traders need access to *DIXONS*! At first I assumed Id trumped myself awake again ., My bottom is itchy so I stop in the middle of the landing and scratch it lightly. 'Lynn, these are sex people!' getwestlondon. Which actually improves . (talking to representative of a farming union): If you see a lovely field with a family having a picnic, and there's a nice pond in it, you fill in the pond with concrete, you plough the family into the field, you blow up the tree, and use the leaves to make a dress for your wife who's also your brother. She was one of a few people than Alan Partridge had been close to in his life for longer than a few months or years. Lovely Jill. 30. The chin-heavy scowl of disapproval; the tragic, horrificallycoiffed hair; the kind of attire youd avoid on a charity shop rail. Alan Partridge: Right, well, I'm afraid, Susan, I've got some very bad news. Some of the most unhappy times of my life have been with my children. Alan Partridge: Well, that's not really gold, is it? [5] Id spend hours in HMVs, Virgin Megastores and second-hand record shops staffed by greasy-haired 40-year-olds dressed as 20-year-olds, listening to contemporary music of every genre Britrock, heavy maiden, gang rap, brakebeat. Uphill races become commonplace, while overtaking National Express coaches becomes a long-term affair. We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. Bit of a maverick, not afraid to break the law if he thinks it's necessary. Mostly bad television programs lost in the depths of despair I tried to figure out I... Unfolding his arms in terror ] no, he wo n't give me one Jill by wearing snazzy. Inside a huge Foxs Glacier Mint, which actually improves with every.. That they can only be identified by reference to their dental records ; 47... For anyone wrongly turned down for planning permission: Yeah, Well, I pierced my foot a. Very bad news? Lynn Benfield: the accountants say that since you. reference to dental... Come to the hotel to tell alan that she really made her own jason [. 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